Dating ins and outs for 2025

What’s in and out when it comes to relationships, singlehood and casual dating in 2025? Here, the editorial team at Sextras weighs in

IN

Banning men to your archived convos on WhatsApp 

Lucy 

Kind of a Marie Kondo technique applied to your dating life. Out of notifications, out of sight, out of emotional energy. Is it petty? Maybe. Is it effective? Absolutely. It’s perfect for those moments when someone’s text has thrown off your cosy winter vibes – no need to see their little face staring at you every time you open your messages. 

Plus, the manual check-in to see if they’ve texted is just that much more effort that you might not notice for a while if they actually have – and I personally find deep, petty pleasure in leaving men on delivered when they’ve pissed me off. 

Romantic admin

Dani

Everyone knows winter is for romance. It’s the perfect temporal setting for a cosy romantic comedy, and the unofficial season of making your relationship official. I’m all in favour of a sweeping, passionate moment (embrace the cringe), but in 2025 we’re starting as we mean to go on and embracing romantic gestures beyond the winter period. 

As I reflect on the previous year and draw up my resolutions, I’m going to use this as an opportunity to do a bit of forward planning. (It’s also a gift to myself: the key to my heart is admin.) I invite you to do the same. This could mean setting recurring reminders to buy your partner their favourite supermarket treat, perhaps making a reservation three months from now for that jazz bar they said they wanted to go to, or booking them in for an October dinner date at yours. The planning aspect could also be a fun date in itself – a chance to sit down with your laptops and calendars and work out when you’re free for movie nights, weekends away, and family visits. 

Of course, this same concept can – and should – be applied to non-romantic connections. Think about what your mum might like for her birthday a month, rather than a week, before; book a trip to Copenhagen with your favourite cousin; set yourself a bimonthly alert to call your long-distance best friend. So often, we tell ourselves we don’t have the time or energy for gestures, but with a bit of preparation, we can all be better partners, friends, and so on. Maybe I’m biased, but organisation is intensely sexy.

Flings

Honey 

It seems like every conversation about dating and relationships at the moment revolves around swearing it off. But, before we all jump into something drastic and irreversible, does it really need to be that serious? 

I’m about to turn (shudder) 25, and I’ve had three year-long relationships; countless other situationships/friends-with-benefits/whatever-you-want-to-call them-ships. I even did 18 months of celibacy. But amid all of that, what’s been missing is a bit of good old fashioned fun.

Don’t get me wrong, fun has been had along the way, but mostly as a stopover to someone getting their feelings in a mess. So, following my latest breakup (reveal) I’ve decided it’s time to stop intellectualising my dating life; agonising over the decision of whether something, or someone, is right for me; and to embrace flings. 

Dating and sex should be fun, after all – and as my mum constantly reminds me: you should be having hot sex in your 20s! Fuck finding your soulmate, or getting lost in deep feelings (I’m not being avoidant, I promise). 

What I really need is to toe the line; indulge in a bit of harmless flirting; and end up sleeping with lots and lots of people who want the exact same thing as me: meaningless sex and a good time. You heard it here first, people! I’ve got sex toys aplenty and time and space galore, so what better time to fling myself about than when I’m not being distracted by the threat of children or marriage? 

Questioning the ick

Charlie Elizabeth 

As we reach the end of the year, I’ve been forced to have a long, hard look at myself and my dating habits – or lack thereof. While all my friends spend their New Year’s Eves on loved-up getaways, I’ll be, in all likelihood, sobbing in the bath while the fireworks go off, thinking about all the failed first dates I’ve been on this year. What was so wrong with these people that I wouldn’t even agree to a second meeting with them? 

Some reflection has made me realise that it’s my fault – I’ll be humble and admit it. I’ve developed a tendency this year to get the ick over the slightest of missteps. A hinge date spills their drink, or snorts a little when they laugh. They’re early for our date, they’re late, they’re on time… I need to start questioning why I’m so quick to catch the ick and realise that maybe, just maybe, I’m a little scared of abandonment and using it as an excuse to run away. Of course, the ick is real and should be listened to in most situations, but questioning it and trying to dig deeper into the ‘why’ causing it can’t do any harm. 

Not going back to the same guy again… and again… and again…

Kiran

As we’re entering the new year, I’ve had some time to reflect on my dating habits this year and I would have saved myself a lot of heartbreak if I had just learnt to cut my losses and move on whenever a situation would end. Instead I always went back or somehow held out hope that things would work out. That led to them either getting a girlfriend straight after me or spending the night flirting with a nun in front of me (it was Halloween). 

2025 is the year that I will grow a backbone and stop going back to men who don’t want to be with me. It sounds so obvious yet so many of us do it. Self-worth I think is a big factor and attachment issues, but I am going to make a conscious effort that once something ends to move forwards. 

OUT

Cuffing season

Lucy

Sure, the idea of snuggling up with someone during the colder months is cute, but let’s not get carried away just because it’s been branded as “a thing”. Relationships should be about connection and compatibility, not about ticking off seasonal trends. 

Of course, we all want happiness and love, but unless you’ve met someone who’s genuinely worth it, there’s no need to rush into anything just to have someone to kiss at midnight on New Year’s Eve. Focus on yourself, enjoy your hot chocolate solo, and let the right person come along when the time is actually right. 

Beating around the bush

Honey 

I don’t mean literally, because I intend to do a lot more of that. Rather, I’m done with flirtationships and the hours of texts or slew of Instagram story likes – which often lead to rejection anyway – expected by the modern mores of dating.

In 2025 I will grab flirting by the horns, and be so upfront people won’t know what’s hit them. Though I’ve never been one for calling a spade a spade, I’m sick and tired of investing my time and effort into hoping someone likes me back. I’m in my mid-20s, for fuck’s sake, let’s get a move on and stop being so damn coy.

Stay tuned for whether this mindset translates to practice, but if there’s anyone out there reading this that’s interested, I invite you to gracefully express your intent before the clock strikes midnight on 31 December to beat the trend. Ttyl! 

Dialling things down

Charlie Elizabeth

Whether it’s deleting the kiss after your email sign off, changing your outfit 10 minutes before leaving the house, or trying to appear demure, sultry and nonchalant, we all dial this aspect of our personalities down and that bit up a little in the presence of new people. Why? I’m sick of trying to be more palatable to the new people I meet in the hopes they like me. News flash, if you’re not being yourself, they’re never going to like you as the you that you are - try saying that on New Year’s Eve when the clock strikes midnight! 

We can all benefit from being the passionate personalities we really are as the New Year rolls around. Give it a try and you’re sure to find people who match your energy and make you feel seen. 

Taking social media seriously

Dani

In 2025, it’s a truth universally acknowledged that the endless scroll is incredibly unchic. A cultural shift towards spending less time online has been a long time coming (for evidence, see: the rise of IRL clubs, communities and celebrity look-alike competitions over the last few months). But beyond an increasingly widespread desire to make in-person connections, I think more people are waking up to the fact that being on social media all the time has fostered, in all of us, a warped attitude towards relationships and social connections.

Being able to see that your Hinge date from three years ago just got back from Prague? Not normal. Neither is being aware of what your childhood bully had for breakfast. Thanks to socials, we know far too much about too many people, despite no one actually caring what anyone else is doing. Even having a follower count, which people watch go up and down with baited breath, is bizarre. Most of us could count on two hands the people we are close to, talk to regularly and care about what they’re doing with their days. But opening the app and seeing a thousand names? In the words of Martin Scorsese, who are these people??

And yes, I’m a hypocrite – I love meaningless Instagram-story posting as much as the next 20-something girl. Let this be a reminder to all of us to keep it fun and flirty, to get offline where possible, and to gain some perspective. After all, if it wasn’t so easy to stalk your ex’s ex, would you even give a shit?

Jumping to conclusions

Kiran

This one sounds a lot but hear me out. I have come to the conclusion (lol) that I am not a chill girl. And will never be a chill girl. I will always overthink! This translates into my dating life as I end up ruining things but thinking too far ahead instead of just going with the flow. I will feel a spark with someone and then the inevitable pressure of ‘I will either be with this person forever or things will eventually end’ creeps in and I manage to convince myself that we’re not a match. 

This year, I’m making an active effort to be present and enjoy dating someone for what it is and letting things develop organically. Instead of three dates down and imagining what our wedding day is going to be like. Letting go of whether or not this guy will be the one will actually allow me to focus on whether or not we’re compatible and if I like them or not, instead of the idea of them.

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