Had a nasty fight with your mum? Or had a partner break up with you out of the blue? Do you really want the girl at work to fancy you back? Look no further. Taking wisdom from professional crystal healers, Alice Wade compiles a complete list of crystal recommendations for love and relationships of all kinds

If, like me, you’re on the side of TikTok that regularly offers up tarot readings, astrological predictions and generally witchy content, you’ll likely have at least dipped your toe in the shimmering waters of crystal tok.

Bringing in 19.4 billion views on the app, it’s clear there’s no shortage of people out there who believe in the intrinsic magic of these glittery, pretty rocks. And there are crystals to help every ailment and woe, from giving you hope in times of grief (rhodonite apparently brings this out to kickstart healing), to manifesting splashes of cash (green jade is said to bring wealth and harmony).

Whatever your ailment, there is a fossilised resin rock to promote the healing of anything mental, physical or spiritual. Before we get into what can be used for , let’s get into the method behind the magic. How actually is it that these miracle rocks work? 

Several crystal healers believe that power is harnessed through crystals interacting with the body’s energy fields. The idea is that they can communicate with this vibrational energy in the body to redirect or channel certain energy flows, freeing up blocked channels. This then facilitates balance and alignment and can help you reach your potential. 

Julie Baldino is an advanced crystal healer and energy alchemist. She has 39.9k followers on TikTok, and uses her platform to show crystal healing to clients. Baldino believes in the transformative power of crystal healing and is adamant that, “our entire energetic system needs to be balanced in order to be fully open to love and sexual pleasure”.

She says crystals interact with seven chakras, each acting as energy centres. * When these centres are blocked, they “can completely shut you down emotionally and sexually”.

The root chakra, which makes us feel safe in our bodies. The sacral chakra is the sexual centre; the solar plexus chakra relates to confidence and personal power. The heart chakra communicates with our love of ourselves and others; the throat chakra speaks to yourself, your truth and needs. Your third eye is related to vision and ability to see or fantasise, and the final chakra – the crown – is our connection to the divine.

“When I do healing sessions, the goal is to completely balance the system first, then work on the energy centres that need heavy clearing/activating,” Julie describes. Most of the women she works with, she notes, are blocked at the sacral and/or root chakra. “This is due to childhood sexual trauma. Healing the root of this tragedy through therapy, and other traditional methods, is just as important (if not more) as using crystal allies for support.”

If you do choose to use crystals to aid you in your personal growth, it can be overwhelming to sort through them all to find the best one for you. Whether you’re looking to reconnect with a distant relative, resolve troubled friendships, or get the confidence to chat to that hot man you saw on the bus the other week, Sextras has compiled the finest selection of expert-approved crystals to support you with your all important relationships. (Or at the very least offer a gorgeous decorative trinket!)

Self love

In a world where we’re taught to hustle and be humble, practising self love can easily fall by the wayside. But remembering to love yourself is crucial to managing your other relationships. 

Jodie Perry, founder of Soulstice, a London-based crystal shop, echoes this sentiment. She says, “to bring authentic love from another to you, it is important to really have love and care for yourself”.

“The energy that could help that would be calm, content, clear, peaceful, soft. When I use those words I think of Selenite, pink calcite, rose quartz, snow quartz, aquamarine.”

Baldino also recommends, “pink calcite (has major “inner child healing” vibes IMO) or pink thulite. Rhodochrosite, eudialyte, and rose quartz..”

Heartbreak

When your long term boo has shattered your heart into a million pieces, or when that medium-ugly man has stopped replying, Baldino has some suggestions:“Personally I like to use rhodonite (heart shaped), kunzite, or pink petrified wood, but books/texts/other crystal healers also use pink tourmaline and rhodochrosite.”

Perry also suggests mookaite to soothe a broken heart. “It has a very nurturing energy which can be used in times of stress or hurt. Also maybe carnelian for courage and strength.”

Passion

And if you want to add a little spice to your sex life or just want to reignite the passion you once felt: “Intuitively my go to is carnelian and fire agate. Other suggestions are orange calcite and ruby,” says Baldino.

Falling in love

When you’ve exchanged too many glances with the boy on the bus and you need a crystalline nudge in the right direction...  

“I love epidote for this,” Baldino suggests. “But the person must be dialled energetically and know exactly what they want. I also like Chrysoprase for this. Other suggestions are ruby fuschite, emerald, ruby kyanite.”

Perry echoes this. “There are the deeper red crystals which are used more for the stronger, passionate kind of love. Garnet and ruby maybe.”

Platonic love

Baldino explains that while there are less specific crystals offered for non-romantic love, by channelling certain traits, characteristics or outcomes, we can find solutions to different love troubles. 

“In my opinion, creating harmony within a family unit has way more to do with one's personal healing journey,” she says. “Amazonite is one that I’ve recommended often for kitchens/gathering spaces. It is a ‘peacemaker’ that encourages honest communication and harmony.”

For new friendships it is important to enhance our own vibrations to encourage alignment with people who are good for us, she explains. Imperial topaz is good for attracting helpful people into your life, for example, while “stombolite is good for friendliness or providing cohesiveness within a group of friends or family”.

And last but not least, for all relationships, “thulite is good for unconditional love but also to create healthy rapport between people.”

While crystals probably won’t solve every trouble in love (they also probably won’t get a Paul Mescal to fall in love with you), the simple act of buying something for yourself might base your intention and help you to manifest love in your relationships. 

Whether or not you believe in the vibrational balancing power of crystals, just making the effort to reflect on your relationships could open you up to a solution or greater understanding of your situation, and lead you to the harmonious love you seek.