The only thing worse than a situationship is ending a situationship. Lucy Sarret gives advice on how to do it over text, with your grace and decorum in tact

Situationships can be the worst and the best of casual dating – no labels, no rules, just vibes. But sometimes those vibes start to feel more like red flags, or maybe you realise it’s just not going anywhere. 

When it’s time to cut ties, texting is probably going to be the easiest way to do it (and, let’s be real, most of us have communicated the entire “relationship” this way anyway). The trick is to end things respectfully without ghosting or leaving a trail of confusion behind. Here’s how to end your situationship over text like the classy, emotionally intelligent person you are.

1. Be honest, but not brutal

As with all dating rituals, honesty is usually key. But remember, being honest is not synonymous with being rude; some things are better left unsaid. If you’re not into them anymore, don’t mention it’s because their bad breath really grosses you out, or the way they pronounce ‘moist’ is an ick… Be clear and kind about why you want to end things.

Example Text:
"Hey [Name], I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you, but I feel like we're looking for different things right now. I think it's best we go our separate ways, but I wish you all the best."

This message is straightforward, respectful, and gets to the point without being unnecessarily harsh. They deserve to know where you stand, and unless you feel there is an important issue to raise, you don’t need to write an essay about it.

2. Avoid the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ cliché

We all know this classic line, but let’s be real – it’s tired. Instead of resorting to stock phrases, explain your feelings genuinely. Whether it's because you're not ready for anything serious or you feel a lack of connection, be candid about your reasons.

Example Text:
"I’ve taken some time to think about this, and I’ve realised I’m not in a place to continue seeing you right now. I hope you understand, and I really appreciate the time we spent together."

This shows that you’ve put thought into the decision, and you aren't just trying to avoid commitment. 

3. Keep it short and sweet

You don’t need to write a novel. Keep the message concise and to the point. Long-winded explanations can come across as overthinking or even insincerity. Plus, there’s no need to drag out the ending – situationships are already confusing enough.

Example Text:
"Hey, I’ve been reflecting on things, and I don’t think this is working for me any more. I just wanted to be upfront about where I’m at."

Short, clear, and respectful. It gets the message across without any unnecessary fluff.

4. Acknowledge the good times – if there were any

If the situationship wasn’t a complete disaster, it’s nice to acknowledge the positive aspects. This isn’t about leading them on – it’s about showing that you genuinely appreciated the time you spent together.

Example Text:
"I had a great time hanging out with you, and I think you’re an amazing person. I just don’t feel we’re on the same page, and I think it’s best to end things now."

This lets them know you appreciated the connection while being honest about your feelings.

5. Don’t leave room for false hope

The biggest mistake you can make when ending a situationship is being vague. Phrases like "Maybe we can be friends" or "Let’s see where things go in the future" can make things messier. If you’re ending it, end it. I know it’s not the juiciest choice, but if you choose peace, you’ll end up happier (I promise).

Example Text:
"I think it’s best for both of us if we part ways completely. I hope you understand, and I wish you nothing but the best."

This message is clear and doesn’t leave any room for misinterpretation.

6. Be prepared for their reaction (or lack thereof)

Ending a situationship can be awkward, and their response might be anything from understanding text back to complete silence. Remember, you've done the right thing by being upfront. You can’t control how they react, but you can control how you handle it.

If they respond with questions or ask for more clarity, answer them politely, but don’t feel pressured to keep the conversation going longer than necessary. And if they don't respond at all? Consider that your closure.