SEASON 3
Do Gen Z Want To Be Parents?
There are so many stereotypes about Gen Z it’s hard to keep track of where they’re really at: they’re a sexless generation, they’re the most sensitive because they have a victim mentality. They want to be parents, they don’t want to have babies because they’re worried about the planet; they’ll be the best parents… oh no, wait, they’ll be the worst.
But parenting has changed a lot over the years and what went for one generation can completely change for another. With all the unpacking of toxic masculinity, changing attitudes towards work and greater acceptance of LGBTQIA+ identities, we predict that will make for radically different parenting. So, to get down to the truth of the matter (and of course there is no one answer) we surveyed out Gen Z audience to delve into whether they want to be parents and what Gen Z will be like as parents, from different parenting styles to how they want to talk to their kids about sex.
We start by asking them about their relationship with their parents, what they were told about sex and relationships growing up and how they want to change that when they talk to their kids about sex. That is, if they even want to have kids, so we asked who they want to have kids with and how they’d want to raise them if they do. We also asked how Gen Z think attitudes towards sex have changed from generation to generation, including what their grandparents and parents think and how that impacts their relationship with their families.
We hope you have enjoyed our Family, Parenting & Sex miniseries; if you have please leave us a (5 star!) review wherever you listen and don’t forget to subscribe to make sure you don’t miss our next one. You can find more of us on Instagram, TikTok and Facebook @sextraspodcast or our website and you can get in contact with us at sextraspodcast@gmail.com to request future episodes. Pitching guidelines are on our website. See you next time!
Produced by Mable Productions
Original music by Sacha Puttnam
Parenting, Family & Sex Miniseries
How To Talk To Your Kid About Sex (with Dr Tina Schermer Sellers)
Raising kids is hard in a bunch of different ways, but one of the main things parents dread is having the inevitable “talk” with their children. How do you have the talk, when should you have it, what is appropriate to say: these are all questions that nobody really gives parents the answers to. But what if that one, all-important moment never needed to happen, because kids got the information they needed as they needed it growing up?
Author of the incredible resource Shameless Parenting: Everything You Need to Raise Shame-free, Confident Kids and Heal, Dr Tina Schermer Sellers, joins us this week to discuss how to raise kids in a shame-free way, including “drip-feeding” them snippets of information about sex and their bodies throughout life, starting from toddler-age.
We start the episode hearing about Tina’s own upbringing, which was exactly the kind of parenting she has found is beneficial to kids in her research. Tina explains what sex-positive and shame-free parenting means and what parents need to do to make sure they’re not passing on their own shame to their kids.
Dr Tina gets into the different developmental stages kids go through with understanding sex, and what is age appropriate to teach them at each stage, including what to do if your kid is touching themselves or trying to experiment with other children. You might experience conflict in your own relationships, so she also goes into what is appropriate to share with your kids and what to do if they ask you questions.
We then get into how to talk about bodies in positive ways; Dr Tina explains that not having these crucial conversations with your children can set them up for loneliness and feeling as though they are unequipped for the world later on in life, which can in turn make them look to harmful examples in the world around them.
Thank you so much to Dr Tina for joining us, we learnt so much about how to raise sex-positive children and we hope you did too. You can find more from her on her website and find her Instagram @drtinashameless, or on Twitter @tinassellers. You can also find the Northwest Institute on Intimacy on Instagram and buy her books on Amazon.
As always, you can find more of us on Instagram, TikTok, Threads and Facebook @sextraspodcast, our website or email us at sextraspodcast@gmail.com. We’ll be back next week with the last episode of our Family, Parenting & Sex miniseries, make sure you’re subscribed so you don’t miss it!
Produced by Mable Productions
Original music by Sacha Puttnam
Having Sex After Birth (with Smile Makers Collection)
After having a literal human come out of you, getting little to no sleep and suddenly being entirely responsible for another human being is not exactly conducive to new parents’ sex life. But when you are at a point where you want to start having sex again, what do you do?
Cecile Gasnault, brand director of Smile Makers Collection, joins us this week to tell us all about the research the company has done into having sex after birth.
Mothers - being the ones who have actually given birth - are often worried about having sex after birth and the research shows that they aren’t given nearly enough information about when the right time is to start having sex again or how to go about doing it. They might be scared of experiencing pain during sex or causing unnecessary complications in their healing.
Cecile tells us what Smile Makers have discovered in their research with Mumsnet and all about their vibrator The Whisperer, the first ever created with new mothers’ pleasure in mind.
Listen in to hear all the details, you can find more of Smile Makers, the sex toy company focused on women's pleasure, on their website and their Instagram. As always you can find more of us on Instagram, Tiktok, Facebook and Threads @sextraspodcast, on our website or contact us sextraspodcast@gmail.com.
This episode is part of our Family & Parenting miniseries, find the whole miniseries here. Or, catch up with previous related episodes like ‘Talking With My Mum’ Parts 1 and 2, Why Learn Your Attachment Style?, Family Matters and Our Sexual Genesis.
Produced by Mable Productions
Original music by Sacha Puttnam
related episodes:
S1 Ep.19 Our Sexual Genesis
S1 Ep.21 Family Matters
S2 Ep.16 Why Learn Your Attachment Style?
S1 Ep. 39 Talking With My Mum Pt.1
S2 Ep.29 Talking With My Mum Pt.2
Deciding To Have Kids & Outgrowing Relationships (with Jessica Hendry Nelson)
TW: substance abuse, anticipatory grief
We’ve all been sold the idea that you’re meant to experiment in your 20s, something that our guest this week missed out on. Author and professor Jessica Hendry Nelson joins us to talk about being in a relationship for the whole of her 20s and eventually ending that relationship because of differing interests.
Jessica starts the episode telling us about her unconventional experience of her 20s, living with her ex-husband and the fact that they didn’t talk about having kids until it was too late. Having had a baby with her new partner just 10 weeks ago, Jessica tells us about deciding to become a parent: whether that’s something you’re ever truly ready for and how she found a partner that was right for her to raise kids with.
We discuss the expectations that come with motherhood and how she learnt to be a parent from her mother and other family dynamics she had growing up. This includes how her anticipatory grief surrounding her brother’s addiction affected her throughout her life and whether she thinks it impacted the relationships she chose. We also cover how we can outgrow a relationship but that her female friendship have been a constant and fulfilled things in her life that are not fair expectations to have in a relationship, or are simply things that a man can’t fulfil.
To end the episode Jessica tells us about her book, Joy Rides Through the Tunnel of Grief, a memoir in essays that comes out September 1. You can pre-order the book through her website and find more of Jessica on her Instagram. As always, you can find us on Instagram, TikTok, Threads and Facebook @sextraspodcast, on our website or get in touch with us at sextraspodcast@gmail.com.
We’ll be back next week with Cecile Gasnault, brand director of Smile Makers Collection, to talk about having sex after giving birth. We hope you’re enjoying our Parenting, Family & Sex miniseries and we’ll see you next week!
How Sex Changes With Age (with Beducated co-founder Mariah Freya)
In episode one of our Family, Parenting and Sex miniseries were joined by Mariah Freya, who founded pleasure-based sex education website Beducated with her husband, to discuss how our sex lives change throughout our lives.
We begin the episode hearing about Mariah’s experience with low libido in her 20s and how that influenced her and her partner to find new ways of approaching sex. Mariah explains that sex education is so rarely focused on women’s pleasure and it wasn’t until she heard about tantric practice that she became aware of the many ways for how to pleasure yourself or a partner.
You really do learn something new every day, and so part of Beducated’s mission is to encourage people to continue learning about sex and pleasure throughout their lives, so Mariah tells us about the different sexual phases you can experience throughout your life and how sex changes as you age.
Just as we always talk about, establishing a sexual dialogue early on can set you up for a life of success, despite whatever changes might happen, and Mariah gives us tips for how to do that in a way that honours our sexual needs and ensures that we continue experiencing pleasure throughout our lives.
Thank you so much to Mariah for joining us. You can watch her Ted talk here and sign up for Beducated with a 40% discount on the yearly package here. As always you can find us on Instagram, TikTok, Threads and Facebook @sextraspodcast, on our website or get in contact with us at sextraspodcast@gmail.com. We’ll be back next week with the second episode of our miniseries, can’t wait to see you then!